One summer, when traveling, I stayed with a family who was grieving the death of their daughter. It had been 3 years since their terrible loss, and they were merely going through the motions of the life they once lived. The second night I was there, the mother confided in me she wasn’t doing well. She wasn’t sleeping, there was a disconnect in her marriage, they had stopped observing holidays and visiting friends or family. That’s when I realized just how much it was costing them to open their home to me in the midst of their grief. I heard the long list of “advice and encouragement” that was said to them, from the thoughtless to the cruel and senseless. And it made me mad to hear all the terrible things people had said.